hmm

today was a trying day.  i felt sad, alone, frustrated, you name it.  i eval'd someone and got stumped.  when that happens on top of a day when i'm just not feeling optimistic, i start to spiral to a bit of catastrophic thinking.  i wanted to go home, put on my pj pants, curl up on the couch, call guy to tell him i miss him, and daydream about going on an adventure.  then i would feel better.  but instead, i glanced at the clock far too many times and ate way too many chocolate kisses in hopes that that would make the time go by faster.  it didn't work.  however, it did give me a nice nasty stale sugar taste in my mouth.  i really need to cut back on those things.  when i got home, i heated up some leftovers, had the nightly cup of frozen yogurt, and headed to my room at the ripe hour of 8:15.  wow.  and about calling guy?  definitely can't do that.  he is furious with me, of which i can totally understand.  i get mad at myself plenty of times.  i'm trying to think of something i can do every time i think about calling him so i will be too distracted to do so.  my first thought was push-ups.  and then i figured well hell, i could do push-ups and abs.  i'm feeling far too lazy to do either of those at the present being so i'll put that on my list of things to do for future meandering thoughts.